First things first — getting the right mindset
The foundation for an effective job search begins between the ears — having the right mindset is critical. This is especially true if you are currently unemployed. The reality is that approaching the effort with stress, typically manifested as desperation, will only set you back. It is toxic and will slow progress.
Whether it is looking for your next job or a new relationship, desperation is where desires go to die. Why? Human interpersonal relationships dictate desperation lowers your value in the eyes of others. Even if you are in fact desperate, you can’t show it.
I know, easier said than done. That is why we are starting at mindset before we get into any techniques in this experiment. This is the foundation on which everything else will be built.
Instead of thinking about what I don’t want to be (desperate), I am going to focus on a positive concept — abundance. It is much healthier to focus on something positive, rather than dwell on the negative.
People are naturally attracted to someone who has options — another way of thinking of abundance. This is simple human nature and is the dynamic that will get you hired. It really doesn’t even matter whether you completely believe it, although the closer you can get to being authentic, all the better.
Ways in which to appear desperate in a job search:
- Sending out bulk messages to everyone in your network telling them you are looking for your “next opportunity.” It rarely works and for good reason. In coming days I’ll write about social capital and better ways to interact with your network.
- Spending 8 hours a day blindly applying for jobs online. This will make you desperate and discouraged. Only 15% of available jobs are posted on the internet. I am going to test a few approaches to the online market, but blindly grinding it out isn’t one of them.
- Sending unsolicited resumes to HR departments. You’d be better served playing the lottery.
- Conveying desperation in the interview process. More details on that in coming days.
What if you don’t feel like you have options and don’t feel abundant (staring at the ceiling at 2 a.m. worrying about paying the mortgage is a real thing). While that is normal, you still need to change your mindset, at least for part of the day. While you can meditate (which I do recommend) or tell yourself to think positively, I advocate for action to change your mindset.
The action that develops a positive mindset is GIVING. People who are desperate are usually asking for something, they are taking. People who feel a sense of abundance, are givers. Act as you want to be seen and soon your mindset will shift. Besides, what do you have to lose?
There are rich benefits to giving:
- It reminds you of your self-worth
- It shows you value others as more than a transaction
- It builds rapport
- Most crucially, you are tapping into a powerful law of human nature, the Law of Reciprocity.
The Law of Reciprocity says if you do something nice for me, I am more likely to do something nice for you. There are whole books written about it. Brian Tracy gives a nice summary here. One caveat though — approach it from a place of authenticity and without manipulation or expecting an outcome.
What does giving look like in the job search? Everyone needs to figure that out for themselves, but the more areas of your life you can integrate this into, all the better. But remember, you are looking for a job, so some of the focus will need to invariably be on your professional network.